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When the kids are young, be kind to yourself

It’s not everyday that your emotional tank is full. As anything in life, there are highs and lows. With motherhood, I did not expect the lows could be so lows. Prayers were my only weapon.

As time went by, I slowly learned to let go. Let go of being a perfect mom. Let go of having the house squeaky clean. Let go of fears and worries. And most of all, to let go of control.

As much as we want them to be perfect kids, we cannot control their imperfect wills to be aligned with our own incorrupt wishes and demands for them. After all, they’re just kids. And one thing I’ve learned is that, kids will be kids. They want to be free, playing all the time, and just be loved.

The academic learnings can wait. The high sports score can be reached. Until then, they are kids who just want to play. And play, let them be. They learn a lot through playing.

And so comes my own verbiage, when the kids are young, be kind to yourself.

Let the house be messy

All the time in the day is spent on the most basic scheme: tending to the kids. And that entails cooking, feeding, washing, putting to sleep, cleaning, and a lot of cleaning. On top of that, add the emotional and mental hurdles we encounter on a daily basis. There are okay days. And then there are the not-so-okay days.

One day, our house will be squeaky clean. The floors shiny, tables wiped, and dishes arranged. But at the same, it will lack the children’s laughters and kisses.

Let the kids eat yet another fastfood treat

We try our best everyday to give them real, nutritious, and healthy food. And sometimes (or a lot of times!), they get picky. A fastfood treat once a week does not mean you are an irresponsible mom.

Let some personal goals wait, and that’s okay

Because the kids are kids only once. But our personal goals can change and be created again and again. And though this sounds like a good advice, behind this are countless doubts and confusion. We, moms, always worry. It’s one of our jobs. To worry about everything and anything. Because if noone would worry for our family, who will?

When the kids are young, be kind to yourself. Soak in all the good moments. Never listen to other people’s opinions. Be strong even if it means being strong alone. Let today’s mistakes be bygone and face a new leaf each and every single new day. Today, we may be exhausted and tired. But tomorrow, I know from the depths of my heart, I shall miss these moments and would give anything for my kids to be kids again. And I’d gladly go through all the sleepless nights all over again.